bar room jokes

Every weekend, i'll make my regular visit to the bar in backpacker's inn to watch my arsenal games. I don't get to watch it everyweek, cause FOXTel doesn't screen arsenal game's all the time.

In this bar, there's always chances of meeting funny, interesting, strange people. There are too many interesting encounters with strangers in the bar, too many to share.. So i'll just share 2 here.

There was once i was there to catch the Man Utd - Arsenal game. There was this aussie so called man utd fan beside me, by the name of Owen, and we had a short conversation.

Owen: Who's that standing in goal for Man Utd? (refering to Kuszczak)

Me: He's the second choice goalkeeper. I don't know how to pronounce his name. He's Polish. ( I meant his nationality)

Owen: Oh.. No wonder he didn't look like van der saar.

Owen's mate: Who's that guy? (refering to Kuszczak again)

Owen: His name is Polish...

Owen's mate: Ohhhhhh.... (With that 'i get it' look)

So called man utd fan huh...

There was another time i was catching the Reading - Arsenal game. I was wearing my gunner shirt, so i sat with a bunch of gooners. There was this brit guy from london, i couldn't remember his name. Lets just call him Brit.

(Henry was fouled outside the box. Free Kick)

Stranger at the back of bar: FRENCH CHEAT!

Brit: (Turns his head around, yelling) OI!! F**KING B*****D!!

Stranger: We're not afraid of you!! Come on, there's only two of u.
(referring to me and Brit. The rest of the gooners had their jackets covering their shirt so he can't see from the back)

Me: (Why am i getting involved in this?)

Brit: (yelling back to stranger) F**K YOU! We have... ( started counting heads) We have... 5 ... no (counted again) we have 7. 7 ok? (made the '7' handsign as he spoke).

Me: (Covering me face with my right hand. Shit, i don't want no trouble)

Brit: (Whispering to me) We don't have to fight. I know the guy. We know each other.

Joga Bonito Sunday

Slept till 3pm today and got a sms from Mo. "FOOTBALL? WE'RE AT THE SAME PLACE. C U THERE SOON!" I wonder what's with the all upper cased message. His messages are always in upper cased.
They're back from their NZ vacation.. finally, able to play some football. Haven't been playing football since after the exams.. really missed the regular sunday football with them. We don't just play with 3 people. We'll just go to the same old field... pass and stroke the ball around, juggle here and there, fool around first, and later just join any teams that are already there. Everyweek, we'll play different types of football.

There was once we played with a HK team. Damn it, there were lots of wasted running playing with them... They don't pass as often, more of individual play. Damn it, those off the ball running which was useless.. They'll just bring the ball, try to beat the opponents before releasing a shot. That's what most of them do, they don't pass. If they lose possession, someone picks up the ball and its the same ol' story again. It was difficult trying to play with them. You'll (or it's just me) be out of breath really fast.. Anyway, i admit i'm getting weak..haha..ever since i stepped foot on melbourne, other than football, i've never exercised...Wahaha..

Today's football was good. 7 a-side. This time we teamed up with some locals and other asians and we played against a Chinese Team. We lost cos we couldn't gel and we looked more like united nations team trying to adapt to each other. Our team had aussies, non-chinese asians, singaporean(me), swede (mo), german (florian). We were outplayed. Its not because we were lacking in ability...its more like we couldn't gel and couldn't communicate well, the opposition were damn gung ho too.
The aussies love to play long balls. The last man will hold the ball, urge everyone to get up, before latching those long and high balls. Back home, playing with broz, seldom play the longballs..most of the time we played the ball on the ground and kept it short. But here, the long ball rate is amazing!!

If football's intended to play in the clouds, grass wouldn't be planted on the ground.

But i had fun today... I guess it was last game for the semester in Melbourne before going back to Singapore.. After football, went home had a shower, met ting, shennie, charmaine and some other friends for dinner... had Bah Chor Mee.. But of cos cannot be compared to home....

3 more days... here i come.... Authentic Home Food!!!

La Cosa Nostra

Since my exams ended, i've been so bored. Rented some old time films. Films like "Godfather", "Goodfellas", "Donnie Brasco" really got me interested in the crime genre movies, especially when it involves the mafia.
The internal workings of the Mafia, also known as Cosa Nostra, is really interesting. Let me share with you how it works.

The mafia is not primarilly an organisation of murderers. First and foremost, the mafia is made up of theives. It is driven by greed and controlled by fear. Everything is done to make money. Murder is secondary, the tool of enforcement, the threat.

The five major mafia families are based in New York City: Gambino, Bonnano, Lucchese, Genovese, Colombo. (If u're thinking about Corleone, thats fictitious... hahahaha.. ) Each family is run by a boss. Each boss has absolute power and authority of his family. A simple yes or no, a nod of head, or a waggle of his finger, he has the power of death over anybody in his organisation.

Beneath each boss in a family, each level of the chain of command requires total respect of those below. Each family has an underboss, also known as a consiglieri (counselor), who mediates disputes and advises the boss.
Below the boss and consiglieri, are the capo (captains). There are many captains in a family. Each capo has many soldiers under him. Soldiers are the lowest level of made guys.
A made guy, also known as a wiseguy is someone who has been inducted into the mafia.

Then there are a lot of "connected" guys who are associated with the made guys, but themselves are not made. To become a "Made man" the inductee had to have 100% Italian roots. To attack, let alone kill, a made man for any reason without the permission of those mafioso higher up in the organisation is seen as a sin which will normally meet with severe retaliation, in many cases regardless of whether the perpetrator has a legitimate grievance. The made man was traditionally seen as untouchable by the law as well as by his fellow criminals, a man to be respected and feared.

If you're a "connected" guy, in partnership with wiseguys (some soldiers or capos), you are subject to many of the same rules as everybody else in the family. You have to give respect and share your profits. But they don't necessary have to share with you. And you are not entitled the same respect and protection given to wiseguys.

I'm not glorifying the mafioso.. its just interesting to see how their kind of world looks like that's so different from ours. And since this is my first official entry, i wanted to share something thats really interesting.